Fic: Crossfire (All ages)
Feb. 10th, 2009 03:36 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
aurora_novarumI was taking a break from icon fic to start working on ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
stargate_summer, but I couldn't resist this siren call.
Title: Crossfire
Category: Humor; Jack & Sam friendship; SG-1 team friendship
Word Count: (I dunno. It fit in 2 comments)
Warnings/Spoilers: none; any classic team season (well, Sam's a major)
Summary: Sam comes to the rescue when Jack arrives at her lab with a problem.
Author's Note: Riffing off![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
annerbhp's cliche icon inspiration of 
This probably wasn't the cliche she had in mind when she asked for fic. :-D Go here for other ficlets. Unbetaed, so whack me with wet noodle when you find stuff.
"Carter?"
"Sir, I think I've almost got the..." She paused as she noticed the expression on her c.o.'s face. He was fidgeting, but it wasn't his normal "I'm bored" fidget. This was almost...nervousness. "Did you need something, sir?"
"Yes, actually. Um, you remember how I planted that fake tablet of Ancient writing last planet that turned out to be a limerick?"
"Yes, sir." It was hard to forget Daniel's spluttering that the multiple time loops he and Teal'c spent learning Ancient, Colonel O'Neill only seemed to recall enough of the language to waste his time.
"Well, Daniel didn't take it so well. He swore his own revenge."
Sam was hoping this didn't mean the colonel had discovered she'd helped Daniel rig the pulleys to his locker door. She blinked and tried to keep her expression neutral as she nodded. "Oh?"
Damn, she should have said nothing. O'Neill's eyebrow raised, and she felt herself stiffen under the colonel's sharp gaze. Time to take the offensive. "You said you needed something, sir?"
O'Neill blinked and rocked back on his heels, seeming to recall his purpose in being there. "Yeah, well, the jokes have escalated..." He paused a moment, and Sam made sure not to change her expression one iota. "And, well things went a bit...awry."
"Awry?"
"I need you to come with me to the storage closet." O'Neill gestured with his thumb.
Now it was Sam's turn to blink. "Storage closet?"
O'Neill was already gone from her lab and Sam had to double-time to catch up. O'Neill was muttering so fast Sam could only catch a few scattered words. "Siler swore it wouldn't go off until...and I had timed it...C-4 is out...How was I supposed to know Teal'c was helping Daniel today?"
"Teal'c?" Sam stopped short. If Teal'c had somehow gotten in the crossfire of Daniel and the colonel's joke wars, heaven help them all.
O'Neill had noticed the lack of her forward momentum and double-backed, looping his arm in hers and pulling her along. "I can't get the door open, Carter."
"Sir, wouldn't Sergeant Siler be better to..?"
"Probably, except he's stuck inside with Teal'c." The colonel turned to her with that mixture of pleading and confidence in her skills she could never resist. "Carter, please."
They turned the corner to where the apparent closet in question was, and she was surprised to see Daniel pacing outside. "Jack, I tried to...oh good, Sam's here."
Wow, these were desperate times if Daniel and Jack had joined forces at this joke gone awry. What had she gotten herself into? Her eyes widened at the bits of foam through the bottom of the door. "Sir, I... What is this?"
"Just, please open the door, Carter."
She could see the problem. Whatever this foam was--it smelled like lavender soap--was interfering with the electronic lock mechanism and the SGC doors were made to prevent opening by force. Not the typical lock picking problem, but.... "I've got something in my lab, but it will destroy the lock."
"But the door will be fine? No explosions?"
"No, sir."
"Do it." The order came with no hesitation.
A quick run back and forth with the right tools, a few minutes of concentrated effort and Sam removed her goggles. "You guys are going to have help push."
As it turned out, her teammates did all of the pushing. The door was only so wide so Sam stood back as they shoved it wide against the pressure of the foam. Sam tried not to laugh as flecks of purple bubbles landed on their hair and fatigues.
In the midst of the foam, Teal'c sat on a shelf calmly, his arms on foam covered knees and his eyes closed as if in kel'no'reem. A glob of foam resting on his head like a cotton candy hat. Siler was next to him, sitting precariously on a cabinet above the foam. His uniform looked like it had been dyed purple. She felt another laugh bubbling to the surface and choked it down with a cough.
Teal'c opened his eyes and quirked an eyebrow.
"You all right, Teal'c?" Daniel asked.
"I am, Daniel Jackson."
"Siler?" The colonel had waded through some of the foam to help the master sergeant down. What was this stuff anyway?
"Fine, sir. It was premature detonation."
"This happened on purpose?" Oh, that explained why Daniel was helping. He didn't know the backstory.
"Sergeant Siler has explained all that transpired. It made an interesting tale." Teal'c uncurled his legs and dropped to the floor with a grace Sam only wished she could copy. She also caught the mild tone of his statement--the dangerously mild tone.
"Everything, huh?" O'Neill to his credit stood his ground, although she noticed he kept his eyes on Siler, not Teal'c.
"Indeed."
Sam decided discretion may be the better part of valor. "Well, if everyone's okay, I really should be getting back to my experiment. Unless you need me, sir, I'll just send a cleaning crew..."
"Thanks, Carter." The colonel looked at her as if a trapped animal, but nodded his dismissal. She made a note to de-rig his locker if he hadn't discovered Daniel's trap yet.
"Save yourself, Sam." Daniel whispered.
Sam felt the slightest tinge of guilt leaving the colonel to his fate, but she knew when not to come between a purple foamed Jaffa and his revenge.
Fin.
stargate_summer, but I couldn't resist this siren call.Title: Crossfire
Category: Humor; Jack & Sam friendship; SG-1 team friendship
Word Count: (I dunno. It fit in 2 comments)
Warnings/Spoilers: none; any classic team season (well, Sam's a major)
Summary: Sam comes to the rescue when Jack arrives at her lab with a problem.
Author's Note: Riffing off
annerbhp's cliche icon inspiration of This probably wasn't the cliche she had in mind when she asked for fic. :-D Go here for other ficlets. Unbetaed, so whack me with wet noodle when you find stuff.
"Carter?"
"Sir, I think I've almost got the..." She paused as she noticed the expression on her c.o.'s face. He was fidgeting, but it wasn't his normal "I'm bored" fidget. This was almost...nervousness. "Did you need something, sir?"
"Yes, actually. Um, you remember how I planted that fake tablet of Ancient writing last planet that turned out to be a limerick?"
"Yes, sir." It was hard to forget Daniel's spluttering that the multiple time loops he and Teal'c spent learning Ancient, Colonel O'Neill only seemed to recall enough of the language to waste his time.
"Well, Daniel didn't take it so well. He swore his own revenge."
Sam was hoping this didn't mean the colonel had discovered she'd helped Daniel rig the pulleys to his locker door. She blinked and tried to keep her expression neutral as she nodded. "Oh?"
Damn, she should have said nothing. O'Neill's eyebrow raised, and she felt herself stiffen under the colonel's sharp gaze. Time to take the offensive. "You said you needed something, sir?"
O'Neill blinked and rocked back on his heels, seeming to recall his purpose in being there. "Yeah, well, the jokes have escalated..." He paused a moment, and Sam made sure not to change her expression one iota. "And, well things went a bit...awry."
"Awry?"
"I need you to come with me to the storage closet." O'Neill gestured with his thumb.
Now it was Sam's turn to blink. "Storage closet?"
O'Neill was already gone from her lab and Sam had to double-time to catch up. O'Neill was muttering so fast Sam could only catch a few scattered words. "Siler swore it wouldn't go off until...and I had timed it...C-4 is out...How was I supposed to know Teal'c was helping Daniel today?"
"Teal'c?" Sam stopped short. If Teal'c had somehow gotten in the crossfire of Daniel and the colonel's joke wars, heaven help them all.
O'Neill had noticed the lack of her forward momentum and double-backed, looping his arm in hers and pulling her along. "I can't get the door open, Carter."
"Sir, wouldn't Sergeant Siler be better to..?"
"Probably, except he's stuck inside with Teal'c." The colonel turned to her with that mixture of pleading and confidence in her skills she could never resist. "Carter, please."
They turned the corner to where the apparent closet in question was, and she was surprised to see Daniel pacing outside. "Jack, I tried to...oh good, Sam's here."
Wow, these were desperate times if Daniel and Jack had joined forces at this joke gone awry. What had she gotten herself into? Her eyes widened at the bits of foam through the bottom of the door. "Sir, I... What is this?"
"Just, please open the door, Carter."
She could see the problem. Whatever this foam was--it smelled like lavender soap--was interfering with the electronic lock mechanism and the SGC doors were made to prevent opening by force. Not the typical lock picking problem, but.... "I've got something in my lab, but it will destroy the lock."
"But the door will be fine? No explosions?"
"No, sir."
"Do it." The order came with no hesitation.
A quick run back and forth with the right tools, a few minutes of concentrated effort and Sam removed her goggles. "You guys are going to have help push."
As it turned out, her teammates did all of the pushing. The door was only so wide so Sam stood back as they shoved it wide against the pressure of the foam. Sam tried not to laugh as flecks of purple bubbles landed on their hair and fatigues.
In the midst of the foam, Teal'c sat on a shelf calmly, his arms on foam covered knees and his eyes closed as if in kel'no'reem. A glob of foam resting on his head like a cotton candy hat. Siler was next to him, sitting precariously on a cabinet above the foam. His uniform looked like it had been dyed purple. She felt another laugh bubbling to the surface and choked it down with a cough.
Teal'c opened his eyes and quirked an eyebrow.
"You all right, Teal'c?" Daniel asked.
"I am, Daniel Jackson."
"Siler?" The colonel had waded through some of the foam to help the master sergeant down. What was this stuff anyway?
"Fine, sir. It was premature detonation."
"This happened on purpose?" Oh, that explained why Daniel was helping. He didn't know the backstory.
"Sergeant Siler has explained all that transpired. It made an interesting tale." Teal'c uncurled his legs and dropped to the floor with a grace Sam only wished she could copy. She also caught the mild tone of his statement--the dangerously mild tone.
"Everything, huh?" O'Neill to his credit stood his ground, although she noticed he kept his eyes on Siler, not Teal'c.
"Indeed."
Sam decided discretion may be the better part of valor. "Well, if everyone's okay, I really should be getting back to my experiment. Unless you need me, sir, I'll just send a cleaning crew..."
"Thanks, Carter." The colonel looked at her as if a trapped animal, but nodded his dismissal. She made a note to de-rig his locker if he hadn't discovered Daniel's trap yet.
"Save yourself, Sam." Daniel whispered.
Sam felt the slightest tinge of guilt leaving the colonel to his fate, but she knew when not to come between a purple foamed Jaffa and his revenge.
Fin.