Alien Babes Get Around
Jul. 4th, 2009 01:55 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
aurora_novarumTitle: Alien Babes Get Around
Category: Humor; Ship
Word Count: 690
Spoilers/Warnings: crackfic. Set vagueishly S9.
Summary: McKay is assigned to help one of the Tok'ra with a tricky piece of equipment.
Author's Notes: This is why I never say never. I've commited ship fic. It's crack and McKay/Anise is a bizarre pairing, but I was punchy last night and annerb made a dare and...
"But that doesn't make any sense!"
"I assure you, Doctor McKay, I have conducted enough tests that..."
"No scientist worth his weight would touch that ridiculous notion of physics." McKay paced back and forth, absently munching on a power bar.
Anise drummed her fingers on the lab table, the small crystal based device they were arguing about between them. "I have been studying mechanisms like this for three..."
"Oh please, you're an archeologist. That's not a real scientist."
The angry tones of the symbiote burst out. "As I was saying, my experiments have been conducted since your planet was still figuring out gravity."
"That's totally...I mean...no..." Rodney was still flustered from seeing the Tok'ra's eyes glow. Sure they were allies, but. He covered his nervousness with more bravado. "Yeah, well you'd think people so advanced would have better fashion sense than to wear tripe...although, on you, it does look quite becoming."
"My eyes are up here, Doctor McKay."
"Ahem, yes, well. Sorry. I've always kinda had a weakness for blondes."
The Tok'ra tilted her head as if uncertain what to make of the scientist. McKay decided it was better to turn back to the device. "Nevertheless, you've never been able to get a fully working model have you?"
"That is why I brought it here. Lt. Col. Carter indicated your experience with Ancient technology may provide some insight..."
"She did?" McKay brightened. "I-I mean, of course she did. But that's why I'm telling you that there's no way this device can work. I mean you have to..."
His voice trailed off and he started staring at the root end of the device.
After several moments of this, Anise finally said, "What are..."
"Ah-ah" Rodney raised his finger in a shushing motion in front her face, than started snapping his fingers. "Do you have a-a." He never explained, just started scrounging through a couple of drawers before finding a scanner.
"That's it." Rodney looked up at her with an elated grin. "Eureka."
"I..."
"Even with Ancient crystal technology this device would never handle the power component alone but together with..."
He rushed over to her side of the table, crowding her into the corneras he reached for the lab computer keyboard. "Here, have you ever seen anything like this with your archeo-stuff?"
He pointed to the sight now on the monitor. The Tok'ra's eyes widened.
"I have seen such a device but not in proximity."
"No, it wouldn't be, because the polarity..."
"You're saying that we can make this work?" Anise looked at him in shock.
"Well, yes." Any further response was cut off by McKay being kissed by the Tok'ra.
"I'm sorry." Anise...or Freya. Rodney wasn't sure which. "I'm just so appreciative. The Tok'ra have been trying to interrelate this technology for so long. The High Council was about to shut down my experiments. But I shouldn't have expressed myself...Colonel O'Neill warned me before that such familiarity is not often welcome, especially in being so forward."
"He did?" McKay's voice had somehow risen an octave. He quickly cleared his throat. "I-I mean, yes, well. It's not unheard of but...I mean, um...unwelcome is strong, in fact..."
"So, how's it coming?" Carter and Bill Lee entered at that moment, and Rodney wasn't sure whether to curse or sigh in relief.
"Doctor McKay has been most helpful." Anise smiled and picked up the device. "I will need to contact the High Council and report on our progress. Again, thank you, Doctor McKay."
"Yeah, sure..." Rodney watched her leave with Colonel Carter, not remembering Lee's presence until he poked him. "What?!" he asked irritibly.
"You okay? You look kind of flushed."
"Me, I'm fine," McKay shot back.
Lee looked at him shrewdly. "She got to you too, huh?"
"Me with...what do you mean?" McKay stared at Lee in shock. "You mean you..."
"Last year when we were working with the Reol chemicals." Lee sighed. "But man, she...well, she's something all right."
Rodney bit down on his horror, the last few moments before Sam's interruption playing in his head and he had to admit: "Yeah, yeah she is."
Category: Humor; Ship
Word Count: 690
Spoilers/Warnings: crackfic. Set vagueishly S9.
Summary: McKay is assigned to help one of the Tok'ra with a tricky piece of equipment.
Author's Notes: This is why I never say never. I've commited ship fic. It's crack and McKay/Anise is a bizarre pairing, but I was punchy last night and annerb made a dare and...
"But that doesn't make any sense!"
"I assure you, Doctor McKay, I have conducted enough tests that..."
"No scientist worth his weight would touch that ridiculous notion of physics." McKay paced back and forth, absently munching on a power bar.
Anise drummed her fingers on the lab table, the small crystal based device they were arguing about between them. "I have been studying mechanisms like this for three..."
"Oh please, you're an archeologist. That's not a real scientist."
The angry tones of the symbiote burst out. "As I was saying, my experiments have been conducted since your planet was still figuring out gravity."
"That's totally...I mean...no..." Rodney was still flustered from seeing the Tok'ra's eyes glow. Sure they were allies, but. He covered his nervousness with more bravado. "Yeah, well you'd think people so advanced would have better fashion sense than to wear tripe...although, on you, it does look quite becoming."
"My eyes are up here, Doctor McKay."
"Ahem, yes, well. Sorry. I've always kinda had a weakness for blondes."
The Tok'ra tilted her head as if uncertain what to make of the scientist. McKay decided it was better to turn back to the device. "Nevertheless, you've never been able to get a fully working model have you?"
"That is why I brought it here. Lt. Col. Carter indicated your experience with Ancient technology may provide some insight..."
"She did?" McKay brightened. "I-I mean, of course she did. But that's why I'm telling you that there's no way this device can work. I mean you have to..."
His voice trailed off and he started staring at the root end of the device.
After several moments of this, Anise finally said, "What are..."
"Ah-ah" Rodney raised his finger in a shushing motion in front her face, than started snapping his fingers. "Do you have a-a." He never explained, just started scrounging through a couple of drawers before finding a scanner.
"That's it." Rodney looked up at her with an elated grin. "Eureka."
"I..."
"Even with Ancient crystal technology this device would never handle the power component alone but together with..."
He rushed over to her side of the table, crowding her into the corneras he reached for the lab computer keyboard. "Here, have you ever seen anything like this with your archeo-stuff?"
He pointed to the sight now on the monitor. The Tok'ra's eyes widened.
"I have seen such a device but not in proximity."
"No, it wouldn't be, because the polarity..."
"You're saying that we can make this work?" Anise looked at him in shock.
"Well, yes." Any further response was cut off by McKay being kissed by the Tok'ra.
"I'm sorry." Anise...or Freya. Rodney wasn't sure which. "I'm just so appreciative. The Tok'ra have been trying to interrelate this technology for so long. The High Council was about to shut down my experiments. But I shouldn't have expressed myself...Colonel O'Neill warned me before that such familiarity is not often welcome, especially in being so forward."
"He did?" McKay's voice had somehow risen an octave. He quickly cleared his throat. "I-I mean, yes, well. It's not unheard of but...I mean, um...unwelcome is strong, in fact..."
"So, how's it coming?" Carter and Bill Lee entered at that moment, and Rodney wasn't sure whether to curse or sigh in relief.
"Doctor McKay has been most helpful." Anise smiled and picked up the device. "I will need to contact the High Council and report on our progress. Again, thank you, Doctor McKay."
"Yeah, sure..." Rodney watched her leave with Colonel Carter, not remembering Lee's presence until he poked him. "What?!" he asked irritibly.
"You okay? You look kind of flushed."
"Me, I'm fine," McKay shot back.
Lee looked at him shrewdly. "She got to you too, huh?"
"Me with...what do you mean?" McKay stared at Lee in shock. "You mean you..."
"Last year when we were working with the Reol chemicals." Lee sighed. "But man, she...well, she's something all right."
Rodney bit down on his horror, the last few moments before Sam's interruption playing in his head and he had to admit: "Yeah, yeah she is."
